May 30, 2011

Good bye



My dear,

I'm supposed to write a letter that could inspire your day. I remember the day I promised myself to never let you feel sad…to never start your day bad just because I am feeling bad… because we are here to inspire each other’s lives...

But today my dear, I woke up feeling empty—
I am neither happy nor sad.


*sigh*
A sigh because the feeling is actually a well-defined one...


The truth is I’m wearing my other face to mask the reality.
I should be keeping this myself but allow me to be honest for once.
Allow me to say that I don’t want to feel what I’m feeling. I was trying to ignore the fact that I was brought by the emptiness to a place where I forbid myself to go. I found myself adrift the space of promises that made me feel unsatisfied to where I am to an extent of feeling discontented with what we are having.  I wanted to ignore the reality and trick myself to change what I feel (that’s why I said I’m neither happy nor sad) but the pain stabs so bad enough. Forgive me for this is not the life I wanted.

I said it was the happiest…
I promised to cherish the memory we created and we’ll create more of a lasting memory that could inspire both of us…
I was wrong…
It wasn’t easy and I’m not seeing any worth to keep this relationship any further…
I’m a weak. I was scared, I trembled until I lose grip…
I can no longer hold on because I can’t find the reason why I should…
Still, I hope to be reminded with because I love you…

But my dear, if saying good byes were destined…Let it be.
We don’t have to wait for us to be broken…
We don’t need to  feel the pain so to push each other…
All we need is just the word “Good bye”…as good as it is…
Let us allow happy thoughts to linger as we make our own ways…
Let's part our ways bringing happy memories with us because I wished to be in a place someday remembering all those times…

P.S.
Our bows had been in silent...
I hope that would make things easier.
I'll always love you

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