Behind the Scene

I’ll be on my Duty post (this supposedly be every 3 days) at the Emergency Room which will likely last 26-30hours depending on whatever circumstances may come about—my fear is not to be able to manage emergency cases amidst exhaustion and being mentally drained; I am more distress on dealing with some people whom I wish I'm not working with.  

Life behind this profession can be likened to a life of a poor hearted lad whose downfall of other people is the one that is  keeping them high, whose weakness is keeping them even stronger, whose darkside made them shineout and each scar they reveal from people made them beautiful. Pathetic way of becoming great. Our degree wont make most us any kinder (to each other), that is one thing. 

If this is one of the thousand ways of surviving, I cannot argue then. For there is a need for each and everyone to come out, not just alive but great...by all means

I am not a  perfect kind. I at times can become mad. I guess, as long as we dont messed up during the play and we keep this all behind... we are all doing this good. 

Life behind this nobility...

I shall survive this. 

Because they're too perfect to know what is good for me...

I don’t know exactly what to brand them. They’re the kind of people who simply fond of asking questions about your life that has nothing to do with theirs. They’re all over the place sometimes waiting for you to elaborate what you have told them. They often act like you are obliged to explain your life. As clearly as you can because their a need for them to know.

Seriously, their kinds are annoying.

For me, there is nothing wrong with connecting as long as it can bridge a good communication. As long as they ask because they can relate and understand clearly what kind of person you are right now. It is somewhat a powerful force that can make you feel better, an assurance that you are not alone and what you’re into is evidently normal. However when someone raise a question for the sake of knowing to satisfy their curiosity then I think it is a very different story. The worst comes when they’re not satisfied with what you just did with life. They’ll be leaving you with comments and will give you some “instructions” on what you should do. Yeah right, they’re perfect to know what is good for your life more than you do.

Why is that a lot of people assume that everything good in their life will also be good to yours? Okay, maybe we’re having almost the same issue, but you can’t instruct me to do the same thing you did in order to survive because we are two different individuals from two different world.I am not you and you are not me.

If I were to allow myself to speak my mind as John Mayer suggest with his song entitled “Say”, then maybe this post are going to be violent.

Say what you need to say [x8]
Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over
You'd better know that in the end
Its better to say too much
Then never say what you need to say again

(Song lyrics of JOHN MAYER)

I’m not that confident though. I can’t write every single word I’m thinking of right now because I’ll be violating the 7^th conduct of a blogger that is not to say anything online that you wouldn't say in person. I am still keeping it myself but you do know I'm pissed.

Thanks for this blogger’s code of conduct in guiding me; I only hope to remember this as I go on blogging.

*The Blogger's Code of Conduct 

1. Take responsibility not just for your own words, but for the comments you allow on your blog. 
2. Label your tolerance level for abusive comments.
3.  Consider eliminating anonymous comments. 
4. Ignore the trolls. 
5. Take the conversation offline, and talk directly, or find an intermediary who can do so.
6.  If you know someone who is behaving badly, tell them so. 
7. Don't say anything online that you wouldn't say in person.

*http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blog

Listen...

The line “I have to tell you something” is quite alarming, isn’t it? You don’t have to be brainy nor a nerdy to know that there is a magical event happening downtown, maybe an imagination  created from someone else’s mind that came into words transmitted from one person to another—gossip!!! What is worst about it? It happens during the transfer when add-ons and segregation of details are most likely. How deadly!. 

Did someone already beat an imaginary contender?  Entertaining gossip makes you a loser, that’s what I have learned from my walk.

“Blah…blah… blah…” I heard a lot of rumors lately and all I did was to shrugged shoulders. Honestly it is annoying.  But If I do allowed myself to listen maybe I fainted already due to suffocation, it is too much.  I rather live with annoyance instead of rendering my last breathe pitiful.

There are blossom of rumors here, there, and all over the place. Such unfounded information can bring one’s life into ruins (if entertained). Our relationship had been the target and we’re nearly hit by.

How did I know anyway that the gossip I heard from a “good friend” is far beyond the truth? I simply know whom to believe and whose words to trust. When I was told of the “on-going affair” my partner is having with his ex-girlfriend I thought of confronting him but with due respect I stayed calm. I’m on the process of making my own point logical. My initial reaction can be very bad—realizations are always found at the end of line. I’ll be there the soonest I can. I'm on the other end.

Okay.. that kind of fight won't happen...

Moving on…

How related could the gossip be with the truth? A gossip is simply an altered truth—every now and then it is altered to sustain an existing intention. 

Gossip can serve a warning of an upcoming “break-up”…but if we were to part our ways (not that I wish for) I’ll make sure it’s not just because of gossip but because of the truth.

In any way he must be living hell with me if that was not a gossip. One of the secret you can never keep is to tell the world you fall out of love. Keeping so can make you a prisoner of your own. I believe he is not that dumb to stay if he doesn't want to.

If no one can dictate me whom to spend life with, so do him. 

Why should one doomed himself by staying in the present while living in the past? In reality this only last for a couple of months (maybe during the denial stage). Each is born with an instinct for survival—some may be slower than the other but everyone find way to move on and live.

So when my partner showed me he moved on I no longer had that reason to believe what other people wanted me to consider.

Thank you for you concern anyway :)