I watched three movies today. Oh miss this kind of days
where I woke up late, drink coffee during lunch time and fall asleep while the
movie plays. This is weekend—I can entirely
feel what it means. I was also invited to go out by my sisters,
which I honestly missed being with, but I was persistent in ignoring them. Its not that I am tired over the weekdays at
work, I just don’t feel going out and go home intoxicated otherwise wasted not
to go home at all. Besides, I wanted to break my record to stay alcohol-free—been
for a month already. I don’t want wake
up wasted while my surrounding spins—needless to mention the “throw-up-all-day”
and “couch-comfort room-couch” moments. So yeah! I contented myself watching
downloaded movies instead of doing all that. My preference is changing and I had nothing to
argue about it.
 |
| I miss being with my Beta Sigma Ladies |
Of course, I don’t want to go out because I’m learning and wanted
to practice saying “NO”. I should really
have to follow my own impulse instead of prioritizing other people’s need or
wants. Sometimes, it pays to close our
eyes so not to see, shut our mouth not to speak, and cover our ears not to hear—it
can make a difference. I’m over being the “Kaladkarin”
type—I mean the one who
believes that Because you’re my sister and I love you I’ll go
wherever you wanted to go, and do whatever you wanted to do even if it will mess
up my plans. This time let’s make
some changes because I feel a little tired of risking my own life for the
convenience of others. Don’t get me
wrong, this is not the end of my social life.
I Love them and i honestly miss them. I’m not pushing them away and I am not turning my
back. I just don’t want to be taken this way—there were times that I was in
need that they did not showed up despite the fact that I was always willing to
sacrifice when they needed me. (I thought so...) I’ll be assessing if I had done something to be
treated this way. I’ll stand corrected
if there is.
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